If you’re not watching “Modern Family” than I don’t even want to know you…it’s the hilarious tale of an extended family: the patriarch is remarried to a much younger woman, with a child who acts much older than he is; the patriarch’s daughter is married to a man who acts much younger than he is; and the patriarch’s son is married to the most hilarious actor on TV at the moment (see his depiction of “Brokeback Mtn” in the charades clip below).

The second clip is from “Community” on NBC (I know, right? Apparently they still make quality TV shows––check it out on Thurs @ 8pm est). It’s the story of a ragtag group of misfits stuck at Glendale Community College. This particular clip features Abed, who is the Greek Chorus of the show. He’s continually commenting on the action and helping the viewer, but he tends to be a little tabula rasa, if you know what I mean…

Finally, the trailer for “TRON: Legacy”. Enough said…

What we discovered last night:

1. Jacob brought his version of the Oceanic Six to the Island by touching them; curiously, only Jack, Hurley, Sayid and Sun are in both groups (Kate and Aaron replace Sawyer and Locke––not sure if there’s a significance there).
2. Jacob’s Six are deemed “Candidates” and are assigned numbers: Locke/4; Reyes/8; Ford/15; Jarrah/16; Shephard/23; Kwon/42
3. Ilana collected Jacob’s ash from the fireplace
4. Esau is now ensconced in the body of Locke––and he can’t switch again; although it seems like he can morph into Smokey at will
5. Creepy little blond boy tells Esau, “You know the rules. You can’t kill him.”
6. Two stones––one black and one white––were kept in balance in Jacob’s cave, recalling the black and white stones of Adam & Eve from Season 1

emergency brake from Casey Neistat on Vimeo.

Is it a coincidence that tonight’s premiere coincides* with Groundhog Day? By the way, Punxsutawney Phil predicts six more weeks of winter…anyway, are the LOST writers giving a hint by aligning their show w/a Janus-faced rodent who’s mostly concerned with (what lies in) his shadow??

Onto the predictions:

(1) Juliet’s bomb-busting abilities fail to do anything other than create a massive white fade-out, resulting in all-out war between Ilana’s group and a yet-to-be-determined group loyal to Esau, aka Man-in-Black, aka Flocke (Fake Locke)

(2) I’m predicting a full-on Anakin Skywalker for Ben: his murder of Jacob, masterminded by The Emperor, I mean Flocke, I mean Esau (isn’t this fun?), will drive Ben into a Darth Vader-esque rage, threatening to kill all of Ilana’s peeps, or he’ll be so disgusted at his being used, that he will turn on Flocke/Esau.

(3) I predicted way back in the spring that it would be totally rad –– rad, I tell you –– if the premiere opened either back in Australia w/everybody getting on the plane again or actually on the plane itself. In addition, they all crash again but get a chance to right their wrongs, ala those Choose Your Own Adventure Books (I loved those things).

Allright, see you on the other side…

*see what I did there?

The composer picked up his staff from the floor and righted his periweg. “Fifth page, second bar!” he called out. But the musicians were slow to return…”

[p. 581, System of the World]